Journal Entry 3-17-16 & A Song That’s Been Getting Me Through

I’m not plugging Hillsong United, but I do love this song of theirs. The lyrics repeated in my head again and again have been helping me through the days…Maybe you will find comfort in them as well. (See video below.)

Journal Entry 3-17-16

I’m more at peace in my heart than before the “Great Flood” (March 2016) – this is because I’ve stopped trying to “help God” or trying to control the outcome. If God is going to move us, it will be completely of His own doing – miraculous providence – I see that now, and I’ve stopped struggling. Struggling wastes so much energy.

I’m so hoping this Holy Week will be extra special – that there will be a huge outpouring of the Holy Spirit at Easter. I truly hope the waiting is over. I pray that I may not depair if God’s timing is not what I hope it to be.

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Boycott List/Journal Entry 2/1/16

This is not as up to date as I would like it, but it is a good place to start:

February 1, 2016

On Friday, I printed Psalm 27:14 and changed my computer desktop to this to help myself to try to be more patient and wait upon the Lord to act. This morning when I picked up my “God Calling” devotional, guess what the bible verse was? Psalm 27:14! I love the way that You work, Lord.

It occurred to me this morning as I drove to work in super thick fog that it was a great analogy for what I am experiencing. I am traveling forward though I cannot see the road ahead of me. It is only the lights on the truck in front of me that allow me to navigate. If I get too far from the truck lights, I become afraid and uncertain. If I travel closely and simply focus on the tail lights, I can continue with confidence. The lights are like Jesus leading me. He only allows me to see a few feet at a time – not the destination – or anything close to the destination. If I keep my eyes fixed on him and travel a step at a time, I feel secure and confident. If I get too far from Him, the lights seem to fade and I get scared. This is a good life lesson.

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Journal Entry 11-12-14

Dear Jesus,

The silence is so beautiful – so necessary. I thank You for allowing me this time to sit in Your presence – to bask in the presence of my King. Speak to my heart, sweet Jesus, from Your most merciful, Sacred Heart. Lord, I have so many questions for which I would be so grateful for Your direction:

  1. Should I veil at mass?
  2. What should I do for ******?
  3. Should we buy land and move?
  4. Is the end near? What can I do to bring others to You?
  5. Should I continue to write for *************?
  6. Why “Our Lady of Tickfaw?”
  7. Where should I attend mass?
  8. Will the Church be restored soon?
  9. What about the Sacred Heart Apostolate? How?

When I look up at the stunning, life-sized crucifix here in this chapel, I am struck by Your vulnerability. It pains me to know that my sins, my ugly thoughts, my selfishness have placed You there. It makes me never want to sin again. Then, I’m disgusted with myself because I know I will continue to sin, even though I don’t want to. I am so willful and so weak at the same time. Please, have mercy on me, Jesus. Have mercy.

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Journal Entry 11-11-14

Jesus, I miss our time together in the chapel. There Your presence is so palpable. In the silence, seated only feet away from Your body, I find peace. I cherish that time with You. I don’t think that I ever took it for granted. Still, You have taken it away from me. I hope it is only for a short time – absence makes the heart grow fonder.

I have greatly appreciated the little reminders You send me of Your presence with me – the heart shapes that catch my eye quite often; the roses that remind me of my heavenly intercessors. I don’t think I could make it through this great time of trial without their heavenly assistance.

I trust that this test is necessary for the benefit of our souls and that You will not test us any longer than is necessary.

I was greatly disappointed in myself last week when I became so depressed and pessimistic. I was under a great deal of stress at work and at home – then sickness set in. It was like the devil kicking me when I was already down. I gave into self-loathing and self-pity. When tested with physical suffering, I crumbled. Why can’t I remain joyful in suffering? All of the great saints did so. Oh, I have so so far to go, Lord! I am glad that You are patient and merciful.

Thank You for finally allowing me to receive Holy Communion at mass on Monday. I was truly longing for You. Are You trying to prepare me for a time when You will no longer be available to us in this way? Will such an atrocity come to pass?

I try not to fear, as You have said that this is not what You want from Your people. Lord, Jesus, I will trust in You alone!

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Going Forward

I have let this blog site sit for awhile. There was a flood of words that came forth for the first few years. Then, the flow of words just stopped, so I posted occasionally in an effort to keep it somewhat current.

It seems that the current trend in social media is watching videos or listening to podcasts, so I’ve been giving that a whirl. Time is still a restriction for me as a working wife and mother, thus I am still not able to post as regularly as I know I should for “success.”

I’m not even sure if “success” (in worldly terms) is a goal for me. I feel the need to continue to share my faith, since I am no longer working as a religion teacher/catechist. I miss that aspect of the job I left. If making videos somehow touches one person, then, I figure it’s worth it.

I took a new job working in a public school, which has been an adventure, a learning experience and a challenge for me. (I would have never taken such a huge leap if I did not believe that it was an answer to a prayer from God, as the job just “fell in my lap.”)

I wish I could be a “stay at home mom” and homeschool my last child in the “nest,” but it’s clearly not God’s Will for me and for my family. He wants us on the “front lines,” as my oldest put it. He has made it clear that it is not time to retreat YET, as much as I fantasize about it.

Thus, I have decided to continue to make videos, and to blog here, as often as time allows. (I’ve got a ton of papers to grade weekly and lesson plans to make!)

For material, I’ve decided to draw a lot from my prayer journals of the past several years. They will be “redacted” ( a popular phrase I’m borrowing from 2020 politics) – nothing overly personal. I thought this would allow you to see my spiritual journey – my steps forward and my two steps back, etc. I hope that it will give you encouragement to know that you are not alone on your walk with Jesus. Some entries are uplifting and some are just plain desperate! Such is the life of a Christian – at least this awe-filled, passionate, solitude-seeking person who tends to melancholy!

Thanks for reading! I will publish journal entry #1 following this post. In case you’re interested, here’s a link to my renamed Youtube channel, “Deus Noster Refugium.”

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I Saw God Today…In the Woods

Just a few of the many pics I took while talking to God and exploring nature – Following the pictures are some scripture verses that came to my mind as well as a link to my new video about Fear of the Lord and Keeping Holy His Day. Enjoy:)

And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” MATTHEW 18:1-5

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.” PROVERBS 9:10

“Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.” HEBREWS 4:13

For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God.” ROMANS 8:19

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Decorating for Advent/Christmas in our New Home & Local Christmas Road Trip

Something much more lighthearted than my last post – I just wanted to share some picks of us choosing our tree this year. We felt like newlyweds again as none of our kids were free to go with us – sad but fun at the same time!

I sewed some new purple velvet swags for advent (see pics).

Also, we took a drive the other night to get in the Christmas mood – it’s been so grey around here lately. I’ll share a few of those pics as well. Have a blessed, holy advent and a very Merry Christmas, ya’ll!

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Links that go with my YouTube Video December 6, 2020

I’m sorry some of these links are repeated. I can’t figure out how to remove them. I highly recommend the video from the Remnant below. The first link is a long video (55 min.) and the guy has a thick accent, but PLEASE don’t let that stop you from listening. It’s really important in regard to the vaccine.

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Two Things:)

I haven’t written in awhile, because I have been focusing on my YouTube channel.  Today, I recorded a video on my thoughts about the death and legacy of Supreme Court Justice, Ruth Bader Ginsberg.  I hope that you will check it out at the following link, as well as browse through my other videos.  Please consider sharing, “liking” and subscribing if you enjoy the content or think that others could benefit from it.

Secondly, I have been watching Fr. James Altman, Fr. Mark Goring and Dr. Taylor Marshall on You Tube myself.  I love their content.  Unfortunately, Fr. Altman was recently banned by his archbishop from filming and posting his homilies in the future.  I so hope that he can find another way to share his messages, because I believe that he courageously speaks the truth that so many of us need to hear.  He gives me hope!!

Here is a link to his channel:

May God bless you all abundantly!

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Dear Friends,

Dear Friends,

This morning, I came out onto the back porch before anyone else was up.  I sat in my rocker just talking to God enjoying the peace and quiet.  Something came to my mind while I was praying.  I asked the Lord if He wanted me to share it with you – and if He did, would He send me a cardinal to land in my tree?  At that very moment one perched in my crab apple tree filled with pink blossoms and another landed on my birdfeeder to eat.  I took that as a “go ahead.”  Even now, five hours after that prayer, I’ve returned to the rocker on the porch to compose, and have been greeted by another beautiful cardinal.


I’ve always been a bit of an open book, perhaps sometimes sharing too much of myself.  My hope has always been (in sharing so much) that my struggles and the miracles God has wrought in my life might inspire others to a deeper faith and trust in Him.   So here goes…

First, I want to speak of that thing that came to my mind this morning before I forget.  During this quarantine/shut down due to the C. virus (and perhaps other reasons as well), it has been so wonderful to see families out walking together, riding bikes, playing, etc.  Many fathers and mothers are home getting to spend time with their children that they wouldn’t normally have had.  What a blessing/silver lining!  However, if we stop there, we are missing the other, even more important opportunity that God wants to bless us with during this time of isolation.  What we need to do most right now is draw closer to the Lord with our families.

Now is the perfect time to go to that daily mass you always wished you could attend.  It’s on television and on Youtube – not the same, but a start!  Since we cannot receive Jesus in the Eucharist, you can make a spiritual communion.  Do your children know what that is?  Teach them.  Perhaps you could say the Angelus at noon before lunch and a rosary in the evening or Divine Mercy Chaplet at 3 p.m., the hour of mercy.  Read from your bibles together, or read the daily mass readings.


We may not be able to attend Mass and to receive Holy Communion right now.  Your Archbishop (like mine) may have given all parishioners a dispensation from mass for a time, in an effort to keep this virus from spreading further. We have not, however, received a dispensation from daily prayer, instructing our children in the faith and keeping Holy the Lord’s Day.  Taking a break from God during this time would be foolish, indeed.

It’s funny.  I’ve been restless for the last couple of years, yearning for a more simple life – a deep desire to live how I believe God intended families to live – working together, praying together, supporting and helping each other and neighbors – eating more simply…  One morning about 6 months ago, I was on my way to work praying out loud.  At the end of my prayer, I said to God, “I believe you are calling us to live more simply.  Am I hearing you correctly?”  No answer – so after a pause of a few seconds, I made the sign of the cross and turned on the radio.  A country artist immediately bellowed, “ S-I-M-P-L-E.  It’s as simple as can be…”  There was my answer.

I began daydreaming about moving out the country – into a little barren cottage, living mostly off of the land and spending my day in manual work and prayer.  Clearly, that has not come to pass yet, however, we all find ourselves forced to live much more simply right now.  It’s funny, I believe that God often gives me inspirations, so to speak, but they rarely play out the way that I envision.  I believe that He has given us the gift of simple living right now, and we need to pray that we use it wisely, and learn from it what we must.

I’ll share one more word of wisdom I received several months ago.  I was having a moment of self-pity/jealousy as I scrolled through Facebook at many of my friends on fabulous vacations.  (I don’t begrudge them, by any means.)  I asked the Lord why we could not take a vacation, even if a frugal one. (how I miss the Smoky Mountains!)  These words came to me. “It’s not time for vacation but for reparation.”  Wow.  That put me in my place quickly.

There is indeed a tremendous amount of evil that we are living in the midst of in our world today.  (But remember that wherever evil/sin abound, grace abounds all the more!) Many don’t want to know about it.  Many make excuses for it.  Many simple can’t think about it because it is too disturbing.  I get it!  As evil advances, we must fight through much prayer, fasting and sacrifices! We must care about the souls of our brothers and sisters in the world who are (seemingly) joyfully jumping head first into the fiery pit!  Hell is forever, ya’ll!  We need to pray for them and make reparation for them if they will not do it for themselves.  We need to make reparation for our own sins.  (Ask the Holy Spirit to illuminate your mind to learn what sins you may not be aware of that offend God the most.) For my protestant friends, I know that Jesus died for our sins in a once and for all sacrifice.  I believe that when I am repentant that my sins are forgiven, but that there are still consequences/motives for my actions that need to be purified.


To recap, this is what I believe God is asking of us now:

*to remain faithful and steadfast

*to draw closer to Him through scripture and prayer – especially

the rosary (if you are Catholic)

*to live more simply

*to support each other

*to make reparation for our own sins & the grave sins of the


*to surrender and to trust Him completely to provide for us and

to protect us


Speaking of surrender, my family is going through a big test of trust right now – just like many of you are, I’m sure.  We are physically fine – no worries.  Perhaps, I can share more about this is the months to come.  Suffice it to say for now, that as long as I stay close to the Lord in His Word and in prayer, and cling to Mother Mary (with my rosary in hand), I have total peace – and so should you!

It is my prayer that this time of testing and trial produce much good fruit in all our families, in our country and in our whole world!


Sincerely, Dana


P.S.  I heard someone say something to me that made sense.  It is suggested that we pray especially each day for those who die of the virus alone.  Those who are succumbing to this are often dying in a room without family of friends, because it is highly contagious.  May the angels and the Holy Family comfort them at the hour of death and lead their souls to eternal peace.




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