This morning I awakened with these words in my heart and in my head, “Obedience without hesitation.” You see, I had an experience earlier in the week, where I felt moved to share some words of comfort with someone – a stranger. I knew that it was what I was supposed to do, but I bungled it up because of my doubt and hesitation. I felt so disappointed in myself.
I’ve been asking Mother Mary to teach me her ways – the way of self denial, of humble obedience, etc. Well she gave me a test, and I failed! Maybe the failure in itself was to teach me a lesson: “Obedience without hesitation, Dana.”
Funny, as things go…I’ve discovered more and more in these past few years that,” The Word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and spirit, of joints and marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12 (RSVCE) This is why it so important that we read it daily. St. Jerome once said, “Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ.” When we truly love someone, we want to know EVERYTHING about them. Do we love Christ enough to give Him and His Father’s word first priority in our day?
As I read the gospel this morning before mass, I revisited the story of Jesus telling his apostles to “cast into the deep.” Immediately, Peter’s response was BUT LORD WE’VE BEEN casting all night without success. HESITATION. At last, in obedience, he cast into the deep and the catch was astounding – to say the least! He felt ashamed and humbled by his doubt and hesitation. Christ, in his mercy did not hold it against Peter. Instead, having learned the lesson, He gave Peter more responsibility – Go and fish for MEN!
We are so blessed to have a heavenly Mother – that Jesus gave her to us while He was on the cross. I know that if we stay close to her, she will take our hand, bring us to Jesus and teach us her ways!