cultural – of or relating to the ideas, customs and social behavior of a society

counter – to speak or act in opposition to or in conflict with

Funny, the word “counter-cultural” has come up for me three times this week.  Somehow, I think that this is what I am supposed to write about.

Personally, I have been contemplating (still dragging my feet so to speak) whether or not to begin wearing a chapel veil again.  I like what it stands for – humble submission to God ( and to my husband.)  Though my husband and I really do operate as partners in the true sense of the word, I do respect that the bucks stops with him. Do I think that all women should submit to all men? – No.   Not all men are honorable, kind and have their family’s best interest at heart.  Some are abusive.  I think that respect must be earned.  Luckily, I married a very respectable man who puts God first in his life.  You can’t go wrong when you do that!  Because he is this kind of man, I look to him to provide (even though I help with this), to protect us and to set the tone  – especially in faith.

A woman wearing her grandmother’s chapel veil recently told me that she felt God was asking her to begin wearing a mantilla again in reparation for the sins committed against the Blessed Sacrament.  Think about the way that the Eucharist is treated today – so nonchalantly.  Many people – even clergy treat the Eucharist as though it were simply bread.  If we believe that this is truly Jesus, shouldn’t we handle Him ever so tenderly and respectfully?

Wearing a chapel veil is certainly counter-cultural.  Many women see it a step back – away from cherished liberation.  Ironically, the more “liberated” women have become with working, being able to hold men’s roles and titles, birth control, etc. the more enslaved we have become.  (I know that there are many who will disagree with me.)  I suppose my way of thinking is counter- cultural.

As Jesus’ followers, we should seek to imitate Him.  This will mean being ostracized, marginalized, humiliated, cursed, and hated by many at times.  Are we  a bit uncomfortable as we move about in our world today?  If we are going through life, just cruising through – blending in – because it is what is most comfortable, are we doing what we have been called to do?  Can we produce “great fruit” that way?

Being counter-cultural means acting differently, speaking differently, dressing differently, spending differently, choosing different entertainment, practicing chastity, living more simply…  Sound overwhelming?  Have Courage!  When we live our lives in a way that is counter-cultural, we do not have to go it alone.  The One who has experienced it all, and was triumphant over the cross walks with us!  He will not abandon His friends.

About danardoyle

I am a Catholic, working wife and mother. I have three children ages 14, 20 and 27. I am extremely busy, as you can imagine. I aim each and every day to put God first in my life, to teach my children the Faith, to be a supportive spouse, keep the house in order, and do my job outside of the home well, too. That's an impossible task - without Divine intervention! Here, I hope to share my triumphs and struggles with other working moms in the same boat. I will share the tools I have discovered to making it all work - most days!
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6 Responses to Countercultural

  1. neodecaussade says:

    Dear Catholic working Mom,
    It seems you have the family support you need to live a faith-filled life. I wish you all the best in your veil decision.

    God bless,

  2. Dana, I clicked on the link to your previous post – “the veil” (July, 2012) – and saw my comment that I was thinking of veiling. Since then, I have been wearing a chapel veil/mantilla each time I go to Mass and am very happy I made the decision to veil. Like you, my blog post on veiling is one of the most popular ones at where I write. To me that shows that veiling is something many women are thinking about. I no longer feel self-conscious and I don’t feel that anyone thinks I am holier-than-thou. Veiling is something I do for God, in humility and out of reverence for the Blessed Sacrament.

    • danardoyle says:

      I think it is wonderful that so many women are thinking about it! I’m excited that you’ve made the decision to veil. I think that reverence for the Blessed Sacrament is so needed – this is a beautiful silent witness!

  3. Personally I see it as a sigh of personal-piety and obedience.

    Because for so many, the only bible they will read is th example we set for them; what we do is so often more important in making an impression, that our words. Amen

    God bless you and your,

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