I always try to be uplifting with my posts, and not air too much personal grief. I just have seemed so deep into it these past few days that it’s all I know to talk about. Besides, I hope that it helps another person out there to know that he/she is not alone.
My beautiful daughter turned fourteen yesterday. I was hoping that we could make this birthday special for her, but after several attempts, it may go down in history as a memorable one – not necessarily a good one. I don’t know. Anyway, yesterday the poor darling woke up with a migraine and nausea – something that she has unfortunately inherited from me. She wanted my husband or myself to stay home with her until the medication could work and she was on the road to recovery. As luck would have it, both my husband and myself had circumstances at work that day that required that we be there – Very bad day to miss. God bless my mom for stepping in to stay with our girl until the pain and nausea passed. I have the best mom in the world. She sat with me and took care of me (and my house) while I was on bed rest for all three of my pregnancies.
I felt terrible for having to leave my daughter on her birthday at a time when she needed me. One of the real life struggles of a working mother – So hard. I felt so small. On the way to work, I snapped at my son who kept saying from the back seat, “Mom, look. Mom look.” I raised my voice in a rant, “How many times do I have to tell you that I can’t look while I’m driving? Do you want us to get into a wreck?” Instantly, I regretted it. I began to cry. It was a terrible morning, and I hadn’t even gotten to work yet.
I cried out to Mother Mary for help. “I’m sorry, Mary. I feel so torn. Here I am going to work to organize a May Crowning, an event designed to show our love for you as our heavenly mother, and here I have disappointed you (and myself) so badly by yelling at the little one. I am sorry. Please help me. Please help us all. I offer all of this hurt for the intentions of your Immaculate Heart. Please help turn this day around. Please help my daughter to get better, and to have a good birthday…”
We held the May Crowning that afternoon at school. It was a beautiful prayer service with lots of fragrant, vibrant flowers hand sheared from the children’s home gardens. The priest who led us asked the kids to think of an intention to hold in their hearts while we asked Mother Mary’s intercession. My birthday girl was my intention. I prayed hard!
When I spoke to my mom that afternoon, I learned that my daughter had gotten well enough to check into school later that morning. When I picked her up from school, she had a bag filled with cards and snacks given to her by friends who had remembered her birthday. She had a big smile on her face. Mary had interceded for us! God had answered our prayers and turned the day around for her despite the very rocky start.
I am so glad that I have the best earthly mother and the best heavenly mother in all the universe! I don’t know what I would do without them!