Why Can’t I Be Still?

One of my favorite bible verses is from Psalms,  “Be still and know that I am God.” In my fantasy life, I could do what this passage suggests.  I really struggle with inactivity.  I feel that I must be doing something at all times in order to be productive.  I have two gears – high speed and sleeping.

As I sit here on the porch trying to enjoy the sunshine, I am bothered by a weed that has intruded my garden.  I feel compelled to get up and pluck it by the roots.  But it wouldn’t stop there – then there would be the brown leaf to be cut and the faded blossom to be removed.  I crave perfection – in my home and outside as well.  Of course, perfection is not possible here on earth.  I know this, but I’m not at peace enough to let things just be.

In the gospels, there are many times that Jesus removes himself from the crowds, and from his disciples.  He goes off to a deserted place to be alone – to talk to the Father.  “After bidding them farewell, He left for the mountain to pray.”  Mark 6:46

I have found a place that is the “mountaintop” for me.  It is the adoration chapel.  Our community is blessed to have two such chapels.  My favorite one is simple, reverent and comfortable.  It is stripped down of all distractions.  It’s quiet, with lights dimmed.  The centerpiece is an ornate, gold monstrance holding the Blessed Sacrament.  There, almost miraculously, Jesus stills my body and soul.  I am able to kneel or sit and talk to Him.  Time flies.  Sometimes, I’m quiet long enough that I can even hear Him speak to my heart.

Try to find some time to “be still” today – to just be.  Feel the presence of God.  He’s waiting for you!

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About danardoyle

I am a Catholic, working wife and mother. I have three children ages 7, 14 and 21. I am extremely busy, as you can imagine. I aim each and every day to put God first in my life, to teach my children the Faith, to be a supportive spouse, keep the house in order, and do my job outside of the home well, too. That's an impossible task - without Divine intervention! Here, I hope to share my triumphs and struggles with other working moms in the same boat. I will share the tools I have discovered to making it all work - most days!
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